It was the day after Christmas and my mom sent me to Walgreens to buy a Christmas card for her boss. As you can see, my mom fits the stereotype of a typical Haitian, always late.
Anyways, I headed straight into the Hallmark aisle of Walgreens and looked around in total disbelief. I literally could not find ONE card that had any references to Christmas, the holiday season, snow, the Grinch…nothing at all! Valentine’s day cards and merchandise had already begun to take over the holiday section of the aisle.
Just an early notification to remind me how single I am..right?
Being home over the holiday season didn’t make it any better. I got asked just about a million times, “Who is the special man?” and “Why are you single?”
Soooo, I decided to share my little two-cents on my own relationship status.
Its so easy to say God first, but how often do we ACTUALLY put God first. I came to that realization for myself. It was almost second nature for me to pray for my family or my academics, but why didn’t I ever go to God about relationships?
I’m not even going to lie, at first I thought I could just pray for my “ideal” man and boom God would give it to me. HA, boy was I wrong!
I knew what I wanted, but God knew what I needed, and better yet when I needed it.
“He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.” – Ecclesiastes 3:11
Society has a good way of making you feel like you need to be in a relationship with someone. You can almost feel inadequate when you aren’t in one.
Praying gave me so much insight!
God’s timing is perfect (can I get an AMEN), and of course, he wants us to be able to share our lives with someone else. But I realized for myself, how can I give myself to someone when God is still cultivating me into the person I need to be. I thought I had it all together, but this personal time alone to find myself has allowed me to find my purpose in life, to grow into a better version of myself, spiritually, mentally, emotionally…
Okay, that sounded kind of clichè, but seriously y’all. The growth has been REAL.
My relationship with God is a priority in my life, and I realized how important it is for me to be with someone who also makes God a priority in their life.
Im going to be honest, I used to have this bad habit of falling for the “potential” in someone. I would know a person is not there spirtually, but I would be like, “well at least he believes, hopefully I can get him there.” Honestly, you can’t force something on someone if they don’t want it for themselves. God cultivates man.
Putting God first in your relationships doesn’t mean Michael B. Jordan is going to pop up at your front door proposing, even though that would be NICE. It means you are allowing God to take full control of your life, to cultivate you into the best version of yourself, to help you find your purpose, to help you filter out the people he KNOWS are not worthy of you, to pick you back up when things fall apart.
I’m not saying I have it all figured out, or that I don’t make mistakes here and there. I’m saying God knows me better than I know myself.
Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”
So, the answer to all my “why are you single” questions
I’m just waiting on the Lord.
As always, Stay Fabulous.